The Tyranny of Time

Two months back, on a Saturday evening that saw me with some free time to log into my Facebook account, I happened to see the picture of a friend-turned-relative on my timeline - the ever smiling face, the luxurious mop of hair and the warmth that I had known for close to three decades. 

Sometimes we take such friends for granted; those who we know will be around when we need them. These are also those people with whom we may not have spoken with for months together, but when we do call, its like no time had elapsed since the last conversation. And these are the people who add that much needed comfort to life, and living with it’s many challenges. 

I’m digressing, so back to the picture - it brought a smile to my face and the comfort of familiarity. I made a note to call him, R.S., soon.

Sunday mornings are completely my own. I am the first to wake up in the household, I take Spooky on his morning walk, listen to some classical music, sip my tea cuddled on my couch, think of what I shall make for breakfast for the family and read the bundle of two different newspapers that gets delivered home. Somehow, this time with myself has grown to becoming sacrosanct.

The Sunday morning following this Saturday was no different…almost. As I was ready to immerse myself in the newspapers, I gave my phone a cursory look and found I had missed calls, many missed calls, actually, from my sister and brother-in-law. I reacted exactly the way I do when I miss calls that indicate a sense of urgency: I panicked, and hoping that all was well, I called my sister. As I heard her speak, I found my eyes well with tears and my voice shake in disbelief as I reacted to what I heard her say - R.S. had passed away early that morning. In-between all my ‘hows’, ‘whats’ and ‘whys’ I could barely make any sense of what my sister was telling me. I sunk into my chair and wondered what kind of cruel joke God was playing on us all. R was the happiest person I knew; I never saw him irritated or raise his voice. He also had this wonderful talent of singing Hindi movie songs translated into English, in the same tune, impromptu! He was affectionate and made no efforts to hide his affections towards people. Why would he leave so soon…so suddenly…without giving us any inkling that his time with us was done, or ours with him was over…

I wished I had made that call to him rather than put it off. 

Time, they say, is a great healer. But Time also plays cruel tricks with us - love is tested by Time, our Time with loved ones is unpredictable and memories created over Time fade as the mind ages with Time. Eventually, Time takes away from us as much as it gives.

I know that R.S. will be in heaven. And if I land in heaven, he’s one of the people I’d like to meet there, if only to tell him what I had left unsaid in the Earth.